Thursday, December 22, 2011

TOMORROW!?!?!

Imagine my surprise when we were transferred to the cardiac step down unit early this morning and then hearing Mila may be DISCHARGED TOMORROW!!!!! I can't believe how fast she has turned around. She is a rock star and meeting each obstacle head on and not letting anything get in her way. We were originally told to plan on at least a 7 night stay if all went as planned. Well obviously there were a couple scares with Mila's recovery and unexpected issues that arose....but she is still surpassing expectations! She simply amazes me. Around 10 pm last night she seemed to turn the corner. (I was able to stay because they transferred us to a bigger room and she was extubated so she needed me throughout the night). She stopped requiring oxygen, she was eating very well, and the only struggle she was still having was with the withdrawls. She didn't sleep great, but all her stats were fabulous throughout the night and into the morning! Today she looks absolutely beautiful...her color really perked up and she is a pinkish healthy color that we've never seen before. Looking back at pictures prior to her heart repair, I guess we didn't realize how pale and sick she looked! I know I didn't share pictures publicly of her first few days post op, but those who saw the pictures said they were difficult to look at and simply cannot believe how quickly she has recovered! You'll just have to take my word that miracles are happening around here!

Shawn is staying overnight with Mila tonight and Zoya and I are at the Ronald McDonald House. As I laid down to help Zoya fall asleep, I drifted in and out of delirious sleep and awake states, completely exhausted from my lack of sleep over the past several days. I kept feeling for wires and tubes and looking up trying to find monitors. The stress of a hospital stay in ICU with your child is unbelievable. I feel like I'm already having PTSD.  I keep replaying the hard parts, along with the miracle parts. There is no way we could have gotten this far without prayer from all of you. Even more than handing her over, and waiting to see her again, the hardest thing I've ever had to do was walk into that ICU room and see her swollen little body with all those tubes and wires. Oh it broke my heart to see my baby like that.  I couldn't hold back the tears.  '

And then a burst of emotions came flooding in....I was paralyzed by the thought that Zoya went through all that alone in Ukraine after her heart surgery. It felt like too much to handle. I got light headed and nauseous, not from the medical stuff we were seeing, but from the thought of both my babies going through this. I was blindsided by the thoughts of Zoya and the sandess and pain I felt at that moment even though Zoya's surgery was almost 2 years ago in Ukraine. We never got to love Zoya through her surgery and I'm so grateful, as excrutiatingly difficult as this was, that we got the chance to love Mila through it. I simply can't imagine not being there by Mila's side and it makes me so sad when I think nobody (including me) was by Zoya's side through it all.

I worried that putting Mila through this surgery would hurt the bond and trust we've built, but it's been just the opposite.  I have come to love Mila even deeper than I did before her surgery. I finally let go of my worries of losing her and just full out loved on her and begged God to let us keep her. I realized how much I already loved her and how much a part of our hearts she already was. I can't explain it in words, but going through this experience with her only solidified our love for Mila and her love for us. This experience has glued us together.  God used this terrifying open heart surgery to help us love more deeply. To God be the glory! Mila is one of the strongest little girls I've ever met. So many times as I watched the intense interventions needed so that Mila could successfully recover from this major surgery, I couldn't help but stand in awe wondering how in the world she lived this long with only a fraction of the medical care in her life in Ukraine. Her life is simply a miracle. That's the best way I can put it into words. She makes me really believe and understand that there is nothing impossible or too big for our God.

Celebrating tonight, with continued prayers for another good night and a possible discharge tomorrow. What an amazing Christmas Miracle! I couldn't ask for anything better this Christmas!



This is Mila's "Beads of Courage" Necklace...a cool program the hospital does...the kids get one specific bead for each procedure, ICU stay, discharge, clinic apt, echo, etc. they have done....Mila earned even more beads today that aren't on the necklace yet! It is as long as her! She is a fighter!

Check out her color!!!!!

26 comments:

  1. She looks fantastic! I just love those little rosy cheeks! You are right, when I first saw her picture I never thought "oh look at how pale she is" but now that there is some color the difference is HUGE!

    Mila, you are so strong baby girl! Lot's of people love you, are praying for you, and so proud of what you have overcome.

    Merry Christmas to all FOUR of you!

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  2. She looks great! Congrats Mila! Hopefully you will enjoy your first Christmas at home this year!!!!

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  3. Mila looks amazingly radiant.

    You couldn't have put it any better to think of the lack of medical care that Mila had in the Ukraine but this strong little girl mustered up all the strength she had to keep on fighting with God right there by her side, is a miracle. One of God's miracles.

    As I was sitting here last night and reading all the posts back and forth with Shawn's conversation with me, the one thought that kept popping into my mind was the fact that Zoya did all this without the love the strength of an enormous support system of love. My thoughts were exactly how you wrote it above, I couldn't have conveyed it any better than the deep sadness I felt thinking of Zoya recovering without a mommy and daddy to love/pray her thru it. To see her now in a loving home warms my heart beyond words.

    You are doubly blessed with your two Ukrainian princesses and they are equally blessed to have you as parents.

    Continuing prayers for a safe trip home.

    :)

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  4. Wow! She looks wonderful, and it is so good to hear how well she is doing. I've been praying every time I read your blog. Thank you for letting us walk with you through this time.

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  5. I was just thinking how PINK she looks!! WOW!! God is good!!

    I think that thinking about not being there with Zoya is natural Sarah. But, I also think that God planned for you to get to her after her surgery. He knew that even though it was only 2 years ago, you weren't ready to handle so much. AND, you have seen Zoya bloom, and blossom into such a wonderful little girl. God knew that you needed to see her afterward, healthy and happy so that you could be stronger now, with Mila. I am SURE that none of that came out right! LOL! Know that you and your sweet girl are in my prayers tonight. Sleep, rest, enjoy loving on Zoya for a little while... Tomorrow is a BIG day!!! :)

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  6. She is amazing. I thank God for her and the doctors that take care of her and her parents who have loved her through all of this.

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  7. Oh wow!! She is looking so good!! Love to hear she is recovering so quickly and so well :)

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  8. Amazing news!!!! and she looks wonderful! Such a glow that girl has about her. You are so blessed!

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  9. Beautiful Beautiful Beautiful your sweet little girl is!!!! I am amazed at her recovery - God is Good!!!! Merry Christmas Basile Family!!!!!

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  10. Oh sweet baby girl!! To GOD be the glory! Merry Happy Blessed Joyful Christmas Basiles!!!!!!!!
    Anne B.

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  11. Wow!!!! This post is so amazing! I am floored that you guys may be going home, I'm also totally overwhelmed with how pink and healthy looking that jelly bean is. I knew she would be one of those yummy red ones and now she even has the pink coloring to prove it! It is so awesome to see her laying so relaxed, she just looks like a sweet little baby who is resting so comfortably.
    I can only imagine the heartwrenching emotions you must be feeling with Zoya as well as Mila. That picture of the machines and tubes and cords coming from that baby is just too much- it brought me to tears and I'm just a blog reader, not Mama. The I wish I coulda, shoulda, woulda's is a tough ailment for Mama's, but the cure is the I do, will, can's. Loving on those sweet girls to no end, giving them what they need in life and savoring every moment is the best treatment. Also remember Zoya was not all alone in the Ukraine, she had the best love of all- our Lord and we know how much Jesus loves the little children! He brought her through it and delivered her like a gift to you and now her little heart is overflowing with joy and Mila's will be too.
    That all said, you better try to get some rest Mama because I can only imagine how those two will be keeping you on your toes when you go home! Mila was growing and improving by leaps and bounds these last few weeks, I know she is really gonna come alive now! Homegirl and her big sis are about to become a little team of energy balls that will probably power each other and you will have to keep up!

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  12. She looks absolutely beautiful. What a beautiful Christmas Miracle. God is Great! So happy that she is doing so well after what she went through. Wishing all of you a Very Merry Christmas. We have so much to be thankful for, especially Mila and Zoya that God brought them into our lives. Couldn't ask for a better Christmas gift ever. You and Shawn are amazing. Love you all. Give both of your beautiful girls a kiss and a hug from us. Love, Aunt Debbie

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  13. Praise God! I needed to hear that message today about God's faithfulness and miracles! Your two girls are beautiful!

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  14. B E A U T I F U L!!!
    I cannot wait to watch this little girl grow and bloom right next to her big sister!!!
    Peace be with you and yours!!
    Sunnie in NC

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  15. Made me cry to look into her eyes again!! I miss her! Can't wait to see her in person soon! Prayers will continue for all of you and for a safe trip home. Love and miss you all, Liz

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  16. Mila is a true Christmas miracle! Such awesome news. Sending prayers for a wonderful Christmas at home.

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  17. What an amazingly raw and honest post. A Christmas Miracle indeed:) Still praying here in Florida!

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  18. I just loved reading your perspective on this...brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for your example to love these children even though at times it may break our hearts...it's so worth it and I know that is an understatement. Your have 2 beautiful daughters and I rejoice with you as you watch and help Mila recover. I can't wait to see her grow up through your blog! Praise God, great things He has done!

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  19. What wonderful news! She is a little champion forsure. :) I'll keep praying!

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  20. Praising God for Pink Cheeks!!!!! Praising HIM for all the blessings of getting Mila (and parents) home safely from the Ukraine and now for protecting her and carrying Mommy and Daddy through the trials of surgery with a little one. God Bless you all and a Merry Christmas AT HOME!!!

    From a caring Grammy

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  21. Wow, what an amazing little girl! I'm in tears! I love her pink fingers holding your hand and her pink face, wow! And I love the beads, what a cool idea!

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  22. The Childrens hospital my god daughter goes to has the same beads of courage program, I think it's an amazing idea. She had 5 ropes of beads (she has cancer), and gets more all the time. It really shows how much the little ones go through and how strong they are!

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  23. Oh my gosh! I love her little pink fingertips!
    I've been reading since you brought her home (though never commented), and its great to see how pink and healthy she looks. Congrats on being discharged!

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  24. Joshua has his Beads of Courage necklace tucked away in his memory box. I am so happy to hear how well Mila is doing and that you're going home in time for Christmas! I was praying you all wouldn't be stuck in step down on that day. :)

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  25. AWESOME news that Mila is heading home already--I am praising God for the miracle that she is!! Her color DOES look wonderful now as compared to the pale features in her earlier photos.
    I too thought about Zoya...and how your hearts must ache at the thought of all she went through without you by her side but as others pointed out, she had the greatest love of all watching over her until her mommy and daddy could come and get her and take her home! I imagine SHE will be just as glad to have you home with her and begin re-establishing some normalcy in terms of your day to day routines. I'm soooo HAPPY Mila will be spending her Christmas at home with her mommy, daddy and beautiful big sister Zoya! (And Mya too lol!) This touched my heart more than you can know..I am facing my own very serious challenges recently and this Christmas will be a very difficult one emotionally for my family. Thanks for sharing your miracle with us! Love and prayers--and a VERY Merry Christmas to you dear Basile family!

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